Soccer practice

The weather is perfect this evening.

I'm relaxing on the grass (must add that I've changed my spot twice already - trying to run from the sun) and enjoying the smell of the changing seasons. Don't you just love the change of seasons? So synonymous with life. We all go through our individual seasons, some are enjoyable and others we just endure. But all are necessary for our personal growth. 

Now back to the grass, it's Urijah's soccer practice today and I'm glad we chose to sign him up. I've noticed that I tend to be a mom who hovers over her kids so I think it's healthy to sit back and allow him to be taught something by someone else. He's enjoying learning a new skill and socializing with new friends. And I've noticed that he wants to appear all grown up, even telling me "mom don't fuss!" as I helped him tie his shoe laces. Don't fuss? And he said this looking super embarrassed of me helping him. Goodness, when did my little boy get so big!? Luckily I still have Zuri to baby:)

Just heard Urijah asking the coach "why do you take the ball away!"...I'd also be frustrated at 3yrs old if I'm trying to score and someone takes the ball away. It's hilarious watching him make sense of this game. And now one of the players just burst out into tears because she can't find her ball (it's apparently right in front of her). One of the kids is busy collecting the cones they use for the drill exercises which confuses the other little players. Some are sitting on the field daydreaming! Oops, their goal post just fell over. Aw man, the life of a toddler is awesome!

The best part of being here is seeing his personality blossom. There was a moment when the coach called them to one side but I noticed Urijah held back. Turns out that a teammate had fallen and he stopped to help. I watched him place his ball down, pick her up and smile as they both kicked their balls to join the team for more drills.

- - - - - >

Zuri woke up from her nap and so I'm finishing this later in the evening.

Now about that good deed. I had made a note to congratulate Urijah. And boy did he beam with joy by hearing that I saw his act of kindness. I went on to tell him that that's exactly how Jesus Christ would want us to act. And that he played well but the most important part was how he showed love and care for his teammates. I'll admit that I am ridiculously proud of my little guy and pray that he remains acutely sensitive by serving those around him.

Good thoughts

So here's the thing with negativity. Once you entertain one lousy thought, then your mind attacks you with a billion more such thoughts.

For the last few days I've been muddling in some self doubt and general unhealthy mental behavior. Comparing myself to others and feeling rather crummy about life. It took a phone call to a friend as well as my mom to help me gain some perspective. Talking my feelings through helped me think in a more sensible way. Life is not happening to me, it is happening for me.

An easy prayer is to ask that all trials be removed so that we can have joy. Right? But maybe instead of the trial being removed, how about praying for the ability to endure with joy. I'm guilty of wanting the problem to be over in order to learn the lesson. But now I'm trying something new, to think of every and any trial as a planned gift that is brought into my life for a purpose. Be it to learn to become more understanding, more sincere, more appreciative...

To become someone I can be proud of. Someone whom my Heavenly Father can be proud of.

And such thoughts have the power to re arrange your mind into a place of better understanding. I'm so glad to have finally moved on from that negative space and to be seeing my life through eyes of gratitude again.

And here are some pictures of moments I'd like to remember for an eternity. From watching the kids play in the garden as I wash the dishes. To seeing them enjoy a chocolate chip cookie on a warm autumn afternoon right after Urijah made my day: he saw me deep in thought, rode his scooter towards me and said "oh mommy, before I forget, um Jesus Christ told me to tell you that He loves you" and then he rode off. Yep, melted my heart! These are moments I treasure. Even witnessing their deep interest in catching worms.

Here's to treating ourselves better and knowing that we are all loved by Him who created the heavens and the earth.

Unedited

This single parenting thing sucks. Period.

Just a few more weeks and we'll be a two parent household again hallelujah! You know when I was little, I used to watch Oprah and hear her go on and on about stay at home mothers. She would speak of them with such high regard and I really didn't get it. I mean, how hard is it to chill at home and look after kids!? Fast forward few some years later and boyyyyy! Even Oprah didn't do it justice. The only way I can explain it is that you're one person trying to keep humans alive, from medical care, to emotional support, being on a constant watch that nobody breaks an arm, playing referee, you're also the entertainer, the audience, the cheerleader, the educator, the spiritual leader, the EVERYTHING. And 99.9% of the time, it's the best job in the world! But then there are those days...

I don't often vent on this space so allow me a second:) so a few days ago Urijah wasn't hearing a word I'd say and Zuri was vehemently trying to get my attention with an ear piercing scream. Just then a shot a glance at the clock and my goodness it was only 9:44am. Nine-freaken-forty-four in the morning! So yeah, we were off to a rough start. The day didn't get much better but we did experience some moments of peace. In their defense I must also add that the kids and I have a cold AND for that reason we haven't left the house in 3 days. So I suppose the behavior can be blamed onto cabin fever.

I snapped this pic below early in the morning during those rare moments of peace...in this world of airbrushing, I thought to just post this as it is. Unedited life.

So now as I prepare for bed, I'm praying for a better day where I'm more patient and more focused on honoring their needs as best as I can.

4am stuff

It's 4am and I just got up.

If there's one thing I'm certain I'm not, it's an early bird. But for the last 2 nights I've been falling asleep at 8pm, clothes still on and everything! Either old age is settling in or mommy fatigue has started to take over.

But now my body is up refusing to go back to sleep. I've enjoyed the restful sleep but I do miss my personal time in the evenings.

So a catch up on our weekend...Urijah had his first talk on Sunday. He spoke to his primary class about preaching the gospel to all the world. Even though I had 2 lessons to teach that day, knowing that he had to stand in front of an audience made me more nervous than anything else. He did very well and sternly suggested that I be there right next to him. He got to a point of realising that the microphone could pick up on his breathing and so he stood for a few seconds, just breathing into it, which I found to be hilarious.

And yesterday was an easy day. I purposely didn't plan any activities because I'm a firm believer of easing into the week. Mondays are for pure lazy behavior here and I wouldn't want it any different. We did manage to do some grocery shopping though.

Have you ever gone grocery shopping with a toddler and a baby? Some trips are truly traumatizing and then there are those awesome trips where everything goes right. Because a shopping trip could go either way, I always try to make sure that they look neat and cute, I've found that strangers can tolerate your kid's loud tendencies if they look super adorable AND clean.

The highlight of my Monday was definitely seeing Zuri fight sleep and we managed to get it on video. It's up on my Instagram @precious.schamel ...it really baffles me as to why babies fight sleep, if someone rocked me, set up my room for adequate relaxation, I'd be the happiest human on earth, but not Zuri. I think she's mostly afraid of missing out on life. Little does she know that her naps are a downtime for all.

And talking about sleep, I should try getting in a few more hours before they get up.

Urijah's first soccer match

Today the first born had his very first soccer match (also the first time he's ever played soccer).

Have you ever had the privilege of watching 3yrs olds play soccer? If not, you must. It's one of the funniest things you'll ever watch, seriously, ever. I laughed so hard it was ridiculous.

Firstly, instead of bothering with chasing the ball, Urijah spent his time smiling and waving at us. He also made friends and chatted with his teammates as well as members of the aposing team. At one point I saw him attempt a game of tag. While he was having a jolly good time, there was also a lot of drama on the field. A minute didn't go by without a kid crying, some threw mini tantrums, others just chose to lay down on the field just because. There were impromptu potty breaks, snack breaks and overall pandemonium. At one point a kid burst out into tears right after scoring a goal. I'm guessing the cheering from the spectators gave him a fright, either way, it was quite an experience. Something that we'll now be doing every week for the next 2 months.

Since there's no score keeping we're not sure who actually won. Which is a good thing because all that matters at this point is that they learn the game and just have fun. And I'm glad to say that little Urijah had an awesome time. His sweet little sister was so busy snacking away that she didn't even care to run onto the field. And she's not a fan of walking on the grass barefoot so there's that...although by the end of the match she did brave the grass and entertained us with her high spirited personality.

Here are some pictures from getting ready to the exhaustion that preceded the game.

A neighborly hood

Best day ever! And it's late so I'll keep this super short.

We had story time this morning. So we walked to the library and actually arrived on time, hooray! During our walk, Urijah practiced he's talk for primary on Sunday. Our church has a children's gospel class called primary and the little Mr will be giving a 3mins talk on preaching the gospel to all the world. He almost has it memorized and I'm excited to see his delivery infront of the whole class. I've also had to check myself and not place pressure on him to perform but instead to just speak according to his own abilities. I'll admit that I did have a moment of panic and wanted to drill this talk into him so that he's delivery would be perfect. Then I realised that this was his moment, not mine. And therefore the preparation also has to be enjoyable for him...life is about the journey right...

After the library we sparked a conversation with a neighbor a few streets from us. Turns out she's from Croatia and naturally she and I bonded on our immigration tales. She's also a plant based eater and invited us to enjoy her splendid garden. As a result we came home with some goodies for dinner. She also has chickens so Urijah was allowed to pick some eggs (he's a big fan of hard boiled eggs but only eats the egg whites, it's the same story with Zuri so maybe they dislike the texture of egg yolk).

The night ended with a baptism at church. The missionaries then came by for dinner and we all enjoyed good conversation which has me thinking about my patriarchal blessing. The thoughts are geared towards how I truly have no idea, in fact, how I can't even comprehend the things that my Heavenly Father has in store for me. So we know our lives in this moment and the experiences of the past, but the future...we have absolutely no idea. Our general understanding of life is just so limited. It really is. No matter how enlightened an individual may seem, at the end of the day you are still human and Heavenly Father is in charge.

That knowledge has removed in me a need to control my life. Instead every single day is about being open to learn and experience.

Ah man, how good it is to be alive.

SA vs USA

You see the difference between a South African and American can be broken down to one thing. Music.

Let me explain. And of course I'm generalizing hardcore.

An American (in my experience) enjoys the sound of music. The music is detached from the actual person. There is no movement. Seldom you'll hear some singing along. It's a controlled experience.

For a South African. The music and the individual are one. Listening is a physical splendor. The social mask disappears as sound and person become one. The moment is no longer still, it is alive.

And now I'm thinking...instead of a national difference, could this also be a racial/cultural difference?

Either way, there is something to be gained from both.

Working out - a mom's story

Working out. Oh boy what a struggle it has been to stay consistent.

A while back I remained super consistent with my workouts because it was my business to do so. And when I stepped back from doing that work, I lost the motivation to exercise consistently. What used to be 6 days a week of 30mins workouts, became one workout a month (if even). 

So naturally my body began to change. I didn't mind the jiggly changes, after all I am a mom of two so my excuses were a mile deep. But then that's all they were, excuses. It took some real self talk for me to become honest with myself. So let's be honest. 

A healthy diet alone is not enough. It needs to be coupled with physical exercise. I know you know this already and so did I. Now what's holding us back from maintaining a consistent workout schedule? For me it was just plain laziness. And the less I exercised, the lazier I became. It wasn't so much my physical appearance (though it did play a part because when I don't exercise I begin to look like a serious beer drinker! Even Urijah noticed by asking "mommy do you have a baby in your belly again?") or the number on the scale that shook me into action. It was noticing how tiring it was to be unfit. 

And when Urijah started asking me to race with him up a hill near by the house, I was embarrassed to see how uncomfortable it was to run. So that evening I devised a plan. The plan was simple, it was to move every day.

So for the last 3wks I have remained consistent by choosing to workout every morning and actually getting it done. Since my physical activity directly affects my parenting, it has now become a priority. No excuses matter when it comes to the quest of being a fantastic mom! And with my laptop gone with dear husband + not having a DVD player, I had to improvise. I haven't been able to follow a workout program so I started doing what I can by creating my own workout routines. I'm sure if I was following a professional workout DVD I'd have better results, yet I'm still proud of where I am right now. And looking forward to now being a mom who's able to race up a hill with her toddler! Oh and it doesn't hurt to notice that the abs are back.

Keep doing your best

In my post yesterday I did not mention the 4 tantrums that exhausted my emotions. I did that deliberately because really, what's a day without some kind of parent-child mayhem.

I choose to mention it now because I wouldn't want anyone to think that I'm some super mom with perfect kids and flawless life experiences. I probably shouldn't even care about what anyone thinks. But I care here because as a new mom I found myself comparing my life to other moms. They seemed so put together and here I was, just trudging along and trying to figure it all out. I don't yet have "it" figured out. That day may never come. But I am desperately seeking to be myself and a decent parent at the same time.

So keep trudging on because the open secret is that nobody has it figured out. We're all just doing the best we can with what we know.

Update on homeschooling

Homeschooling rocks!

I have to record this day in order to have something positive to look back on if ever I feel discouraged in parenting as well as homeschooling.

We've developed a new morning routine that seems to work for our little family.
Urijah gets up, goes to the bathroom, brushes his teeth, sets himself up on the desk and starts painting. Normally I watch him get on with his work while nursing Zuri. But this morning was a little different. He suddenly announced "mommy I'm going to show her how to paint". And so he did.

I really like this new routine. It gives me time to ease into the day. And it helps me to center myself by paying more attention to the beauty in our lives. I've found that gratitude can be a game changer in parenting. Especially now that dear husband has been away for over a month. He's absence has me focusing on being a more present mom. With that said, I can't wait to have my husband back again so that we can enjoy these moments together!

After the painting session we headed downstairs for breakfast. We usually have a homemade smoothie but this morning Urijah requested pancakes. And I gladly obliged as I now use an organic vegan pancakes mix from the local health store. Nope not vegan but I definitely appreciate the health content of certain vegan foods. To our mix we added a mashed banana for sweetness and an organic strawberry jam as a topping. The kids love this mix and I just make sure to first give them fruit and water before serving the pancakes (Zuri had 2 peaches and Urijah chose a large plum). I don't know why that detail matters but we'll just roll with it.

After breakfast we moved our party of 3 outside for my 30mins workout session. I now use toddler music to keep the little ones happy. They love to dance and sometimes they join me in some of the workouts. Today Urijah chose to occupy himself by creating a store and a farm. He told me that he needed seeds, water and sunshine. And once he was done planting his vegetables, he went on to create a store to sell his produce. Note that the seeds were grains of black rice that he found in the kitchen. Zuri on the other hand was a little fussy due to waking up earlier than planned. So I nursed her mid workout and placed her upstairs for a nap (which lasted 3 whole hours! What a good life she has!).

Once returning I quickly finished working out and joined Urijah in his play. He gave me some sticks letting me know that they were to be used to purchase products from his shop. The sticks amounted to $10. When inquiring the cost of a tomato, he told me that it was $4. Pretty hefty if you ask me but then again this was the only store in our backyard so I had no other choice but to pay up. We did the maths (as in this was our homeschool maths lesson ***in the US they say Math while in SA it's Maths). Once I requested to buy more tomatoes I was given a stern No! And our conversation was as follows:

Urijah: Mommy, you can't buy everything in my store, then I'll have nothing for tomorrow.

Me: But the point of a store is to sell everything so that you can make a profit.

Urijah: I don't have a prophet. Jesus has a prophet ok!

Me: No I'm talking about a different kind of profit P R O F I T. Not P R O P H E T. The one is about making money from your business and the other one is like Adam (as in Adam and Eve) or President Thomas S Monson.

Urijah: Oh. Well you can't buy any more of my stuff mommy. Go to the farmer's market. It's that way. (said while pointing toward the make believe farm)

And so I left for the farmer's market.

Once we were done playing, we headed out into the garden to pick a snack (tomatoes and strawberries). Both incredibly delicious! But before digging into our snack Urijah was determined to fight a fire like a real firefighter and so I obliged by delivering water in a watering can and brought along his fireman chief hat. It's so cute to see how invested he was in saving people from the imaginary danger.

When we finally sat down to enjoy the sun, a praying mantis dropped by for a visit. And that opened up an opportunity to do some studying on insects. Among other things, we now know that a praying mantis has a powerful jaw and bites its prey in the neck. The things that fascinate little Urijah...

After a little downtime I made lunch and we sat on the porch feasting on Urijah's favorite Dr Suess books. While on the porch I attempted to explain to him why picking his nose was a gross habit. He didn't believe me on the part of spreading germs so we watched a 5mins YouTube kid science show about how boogers are formed. I know this sounds pretty yucky but it was necessary. He loved video, we watched it a few times, stopping for questions and relating the content in a way that's relevant to him. I wish I could say the habit is gone...unfortunately I'm still dealing with a nose picking toddler.

A little while later Zuri woke up and we headed out to the park. But before moving on with the day, I must mention how kids are so keen to learn. Even though I'm not actively schooling Zuri at this point, she is imitating what she's observing. A few days ago I was in the kitchen and the was silence in the lounge. Now if you have kids then you know that silence could mean trouble. So I ran out to see what she was up to, only to find my sweet girl curled up on the big recliner with a book. She sees me almost every evening relaxing with a book, curled up in the exact same way. And this morning I captured that very same moment with her and her big brother.

...back to the run down of the day...

It ended with bathtime and while bathing Zuri, Urijah busied himself learning about the alligators and crocodiles from his new library books.

***Note: he can't read yet so when reading new books he mostly looks at the pictures, tells me about what he's seeing (eg: Mommy this is a mommy alligator and she's sitting on her eggs so that they can hatch. See! There's the baby alligator). And after chatting about the picture he normally asks me to read the writing. And with books that we've read several times, he'll "read" them to himself from memory.

And after reading a Curious George book and scripture, it was time for prayer and bed.

Today was a very good day. And I'm excited to continue exploring our homeschooling adventure!